Khetha ikhasi
  • Ukuze uguqule impilo yakho, kufanele uqale wazi ukuthi ungubani nokuthi uyini.
  • Ngokudlulela ngale kokukha phezulu kanye nezindaba ezimayelana nawe abanye abakutshele zona, ungakwazi ukuxhumana nendaba yakho ethile.
  • Uma le mibuzo isiphenduliwe, ungaqala ukuyibhala kabusha indaba yakho ngokubamba iqhaza ohlelweni lokwakha kabusha ukulandisa.

Abanye abantu babonakala bengakwazi ukusiza ukuvuselela ukungqubuzana, noma ukuba nezwi lokugcina, noma ukushiya ukusebenzelana okunzima nomuntu omthandayo ekuphumeni okunomsindo nokuxokozelayo. Abanye abantu bavele baba ndikindiki, abazi ukuthi bazothini, bavele baba ndikindiki ngesikhathi sengxabano. Uma sekuthulekile uthuli, ngiye ngizwe abantu bebabaza, “Yimi lo”, noma “Yimina kuphela” noma “angikwazi ukuzibamba. Ngiyangabaza ukuthi ngingake ngishintshe.

Uma abantu besho lokhu, into yokuqala engiyibuzayo ukuthi: 'Lisho bani noma lithini igama' 'engibhekisela kulo kulezi zitatimende? Ubani noma yini 'mina' engakwazi ukushintsha? Impendulo ibalulekile mayelana nokuthi umuntu othile uzozimisela ukwenzani ukuze aqale inqubo yoshintsho empilweni yakhe.

Ukuze kube noshintsho, udinga ukwazi ukuthi ubani noma yini ngempela ozama ukuyishintsha.

Zama ukuphendula lo mbuzo, usho ngokuzwakalayo noma uwubhale phansi: uyini?

Uma uphendule: “Ngingowesifazane, indoda, intombazane, umfana, umuntu, njll. ", Zama futhi. Ungaya ocansini lwebhayoloji, kodwa ube yindoda noma owesifazane, njll. kuyingxenye yobuwena. Ngamanye amazwi, amadoda amabili emvelo ahlukene angase abe nenguqulo ehluke ngokuphelele yokuthi kusho ukuthini ukuba indoda. Le ndaba empeleni iyingxenye yokuthi ungubani. Ngakho-ke kumbuzo othi 'yini', ngivame ukukhuthaza abantu ukuthi babaluleke kakhulu.

Ungaphendula umbuzo ngokuthi, "Ngingumzimba, ubuchopho, umphefumulo, noma ukwazi." Ngayinye yalokhu okungenhla inesethi yayo yamandla nemikhawulo ekhonweni layo lokwenza inqubo yoshintsho ibe ngokoqobo. Uma ungumzimba noma ubuchopho futhi uthatha lesi sici sakho njengokukhubazeka noma ukukhubazeka okuyisisekelo (uma, isibonelo, wazalwa une-autism noma i-ADHD), ungase ungakholelwa emandleni akho okukushintsha. Yebo, ungaqhubeka nokungenelela kwezokwelapha, ikakhulukazi imithi. Kodwa lokhu kungenelela kungenzeka kube isinxephezelo futhi akushintshi ukushoda okuyisisekelo.

Uma uzicabangela njengomphefumulo noma ukwazi, ungase ukholelwe ukuthi uxhumeke emzimbeni nasengqondweni nge-autism noma i-ADHD, kodwa umnyombo wakho, umphefumulo wakho, noma ukwazi, kuzohlala kunjalo. . Ngale ndlela, i-autism noma i-ADHD wukuhlangenwe nakho ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo okungadingeki kube okuyisisekelo kubunikazi bakho (yize kungaba njalo).

Manje phendula umbuzo (futhi ngokuzwakalayo): ungubani?

Uma uphendule ngegama, sicela uzame futhi. Igama lakho liyisimeli nje; kuyinkomba yomlomo yalokho abanye abakubonayo: umzimba wakho, ubuntu bakho kanye nendaba yakho.

Ungase ucabange ngawe njengomuntu okhangayo, ophumayo, ozethembayo, obukekayo, futhi ophumelelayo. Kungaba impendulo yokuthi "ungubani" wena. Kodwa lena imibono nezindaba osufunde ukuzitshela zona (yebo, ngisho nengxenye enhle). Kungenjalo, ungase uzibone ungathandeki, ucindezelekile, unesizungu, ungokomzwelo ngokweqile, futhi usabela ngokushesha. Kungaba futhi impendulo yokuthi "ungubani" wena. Kodwa (futhi angifuni ukukhubazeka) futhi kuyindaba nje. Lezi zindaba, noma izindaba ezixoxwayo, kungenzeka kube yilezo obuzitshela zona isikhathi eside kangangoba zizenzekela, zingephikiswe, futhi zibe yiqiniso nje. Kodwa indaba akuwena. Yindaba yesipiliyoni, incazelo oyitholile kuyo, nokuthi ucabanga ukuthi ihlobene kanjani nabanye kanye nomhlaba. Kodwa kuye ngokuthi uwuphendule kanjani umbuzo othi "yini", umongo wakho uhlala umsulwa futhi unjalo.

Abantu abaningi bakholelwa ukuthi sonke sazalwa njengama-slate angenalutho (lokhu kusaphikiswana ngakho emkhakheni wezengqondo nefilosofi). Awuzalwanga uyindoda enolaka noma owesifazane onobutha. Isileyithi esingenalutho sifana nekhompyutha entsha ngaphambi kokuthi usixhume. Inazo zonke izingxenye zayo, kodwa ayikakabi nesistimu yokusebenza. Ukuze isebenze, kufanele ihlelwe. Futhi imibukiso ibhalwe ngabantu. Ziwukulandelana kwekhodi ehlela idatha, enemithetho yokuyicubungula, futhi ikhiqize imiphumela ngendlela yemicabango, imizwa, noma ukuziphatha.

Ungubani uwuhlelo, indaba, noma "indaba." Uhlelo lwakhe lwasekuqaleni kanye nendaba yalotshwa kusukela esemncane ngabantu abadala ababemfundisa imithetho eyisisekelo yomhlaba (kuphephile futhi kuvikelekile ... noma kunobutha futhi kuyethusa). Lolu hlelo lokuqala lwakha isisekelo sobuntu bakhe.

Ngemva kwesikhashana, phakathi nobungane bakhe, cishe wathatha indima ekhuthele kakhulu ekubhaleni indaba yakhe, kodwa cishe akazange aqaphele ukuthi yilokho ayekwenza. Phakathi nobusha bakho, cishe wachitha isikhathi esiningi unquma ukuthi yini engeke ibe endabeni yakho (njengesitayela sabazali bakho nomculo ongawukhetha) futhi ubhala abanye abantu (abangane, izitha, amaqhawe) kanye nezithandwa) endabeni yakho. .

Futhi-ke uma usufinyelele kuleli zinga, uzozithola usumdala, uxhumana futhi uhlangabezana nezwe ngezindlela ezingakuthokozisi ngaso sonke isikhathi noma zibe nemiphumela emihle. Bese ubheka umelaphi wakho bese uthi, "Yimi lo," sengathi uyemukele indaba njengeqiniso elingenakunyakaziswa ongeke ukwazi ukulishintsha. Kulokho, ngiyaphendula: “Ngeke sikwazi ukushintsha lokho oyikho, kodwa ngingakusiza ukuthi ubhale indaba entsha futhi ushintshe okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho kokuthi ungubani. Uma ushintsha indaba yakho, ungase uqale ukucabanga, ukuzwa, nokuziphatha ngendlela ehlukile. «

Ungabiza lesi senzo sokushintsha ukulandisa kwendaba yakho kabusha.

Lena eminye yemisebenzi eyinhloko engiyenza namakhasimende ami:

1. Qoqa (khumbula noma qoqa) indaba abadala bakho nomhlaba wonke abakutshela yona useyingane.

a. Bhala emugqeni wesikhathi onezehlakalo ezibalulekile nezinkumbulo ezivelele kuwe. Zama ukukuhlela ngokulandelana kwezikhathi ngokusemandleni akho.

B. Qoqa okuhlangenwe nakho nencazelo (imicabango yokuzibhekisela, imizwa, kanye nenkumbulo) nezinkolelo ezibalulekile ngawe ezivele kulokhu okuhlangenwe nakho okuhlukahlukene.

vs. Zibone ngeso lengqondo uhlanganyela nawe useyingane futhi unikeza ingane yakho indlela ehlukile yokuhumusha izehlakalo nezinkolelo eziyisisekelo ezihlotshaniswa nayo ezagxiliswa kuye.

2. Ungayiniki isisindo esengeziwe endabeni yakho kunabanye (unemizwa futhi unemizwa! ... noma uyabanda futhi awunandaba!) Kunendaba yakho siqu (Ngingumuntu ovulekile nothembekile).

3. Dala futhi ubhale eyakho indlela yokuziphatha.

a. Ngokwesibonelo: “Ngithembeke ngokuphelele nakuba kubuhlungu. Ngiwavikela ngokwanele amalungelo abantu (okuhlanganisa nami). Nginesibindi futhi ngizimisele.

4. Dala ama-avatar amaningi noma ama-archetypes futhi uwahlole ngokosayizi wawo. Zicabange uwulowo muntu futhi udlala indima ethile.

a. Izibonelo: isihlakaniphi, isalukazi, iqhawe, isangoma, isangoma, isifundiswa.

Ngaphandle kokushiya impilo yakho ngokuphelele, ungashintsha ukulandisa kwakho futhi uzame eminye imibono ngawe ukuze wandise usayizi wakho. Khumbula: ubhala umlando. Ngakho ungagcina okufunayo kokudala futhi uphume ubhale okusha ngesibindi.

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Isaziso Samakhukhi